“Get a room. There’s kids around.”
The camera advances toward a finely dressed couple kissing in Central Park. They smile, and the man, dressed in a blue suit, tries to shoo the intruding TikToker, Jay Guapõ, away.
Guapõ, who has a history of antagonizing strangers for online clout, refuses. “Don’t touch me, don’t touch—if you touch me I’ll have to touch you.”
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