The French Theory That Explains the UFC Fight

Bo Nickal, his face shiny with Vaseline, had just finished pounding the nose and eyes and ears of his opponent, Kyle Daukaus, who lay on his back like an overturned, squashed bug.  Immediately, Nickal jumped over the edge of the Octagon and landed just in front of Donald Trump, who stood up and grabbed the fighter’s hand. Still panting, Nickal thanked the president: “This wouldn’t be possible without you.” So ended the second bout of last night’s UFC 250, the extravaganza of squirting blood and patriotic kitsch that took place—to the stupefaction of all, including a giddy Joe Rogan—on the South Lawn of the White House.