Pity the Stay-At-Home Sons

Over on TikTok, chivalry is not dead. Feeds are being bombarded by version after version of the same video: an AI-generated medieval princess stands in a dark cathedral, hands joined with some hapless prince. A crown is lowered on to her golden hair; she pouts, and turns towards the congregation. There, a knight stands in full armour. We close in on his eyes, peeping through the helmet. He is crying silent, manly tears. Sometimes we get montages of his doomed love affair with the damsel; they lie in meadows, she in a puffy-sleeved dress, he sitting wistfully holding a rose. Every video is overlaid with a slowed-down version of The Stranglers’ “Golden Brown”. These posts accrue millions and millions of likes. They say: this is you, a Zoomer man, a chad in chainmail. This is the life you could’ve had.