Such Painful Mystery

There’s a scene in Éric Rohmer’s film The Green Ray in which the young heroine, Delphine, tries to explain to her dinner companions why she doesn’t eat meat. It’s because she prefers the lightness of lettuce, her body’s affinity with the airiness of plants, her fellow feeling with . . . well, it’s hard to say. Her hands flutter in the air like helpless stalks as the others smile with amusement and pity. The scene is familiar to me: I feel as if I re-enact it every time I request the vegetarian option at a professional event, only to face baffled questions to which I offer equally unpersuasive answers. My reasons, although deeply held, are not exactly rational.