I’m Not a Cheater — I’m a ‘Cake Eater’

Polyamory wasn’t on the table for Alyssa, a 30-year-old Canadian woman who had been in a serious relationship for eight years before she started hooking up with an old friend. Neither was breaking up with her boyfriend, who had lost interest in sex. “One evening while he was away, we were talking on the phone and had a fight,” says Alyssa, who, like everyone else in this story, requested a pseudonym. “After I hung up on him, I contacted a friend who lived nearby to talk and cheer me up since he lived within walking distance from my apartment. I did not expect to at the time, but that evening I hooked up with said friend, and it was a bit of a Pandora’s box from there on.” The hookups continued, but so did her relationship with her boyfriend.